Holding the Baby Who Holds Us

Taking a newborn baby out of a car seat is one of the most nerve wracking activities on the face of this green earth. You unbuckle the sometimes bafflingly complex mechanism, gently pull each of baby's arms out from under its strap. You slide a hand under baby's head, the other under his tiny little bottom, and gently lift. The baby feels surprisingly heavy in your hands, given how little he actually weighs. He is utterly and completely relaxed - weak and vulnerable - and you have every bit of him in your hands. You quickly bring him right to you, resting his small, warm, helpless body against yours.

And you breathe.

You hold that baby so close. You press your lips to his soft cheek ever so softly. You wrap his little hand around just the tip of one of your fingers. You bend your head low over his, whispering sweet nothings to him as you gently rock him.

All of your being wants to protect, care for, and love this sweet creature. He is completely vulnerable and helpless, entirely dependent on others for all comforts, and even for basic survival. In spite of the huge responsibility, this great task of caring for him - for however long or in whatever capacity it might be - there is always that deep peace.

You hold that baby and your heart melts. You melt. Your world slows down and reorients to revolve around this seven pound being, this seven pound creature made in the image of your great God. Everything, quite suddenly, quite gently and subtly, so you aren't even aware of the change, is all going to be ok.

You're going to be ok.

You hold that baby close - that screaming baby, sleeping baby, cooing baby - and all that matters is love.

Even in the tired moments, the frazzled moments, the beyond exhaustion moments, it's all still solidly, steadily, surely a moment of love - by Love for Love.

A long time ago - yet not so long ago - there was a young wife, far from home, who had a baby boy in a stable. Through her free and beautiful and peaceful fiat, we were given a Savior. And how did God choose to save us? Not through a thunder clap and lightning flash, appearing in majesty. No, He came as a baby born of a spotless virgin mother.

Kneel at the foot of that manger. Scoop that baby right up to you and hold Him.

And breathe.

Let that peace take hold of your heart.

Let your heart melt as you hold Him close.

Hold that vulnerable, dependent God-made-man. Smell his little head. Kiss his soft cheek. Count his fingers. Marvel at his perfect little fingernails.

Hold that baby. That peace, that calm, that joy beyond words?

Let that hold you.

Let Him hold you.

That baby bundled in your arms - His human nature veiling the majesty of His Divine Personhood - is holding you.

He's holding you: your fears, your hopes, your loves, your sins, all of you. And as you whisper how much you love Him, He whispers back - I love you more.

The God who holds it all in His hands came down and let Himself be held in our hands.

The Creator in the hands of the created. The Holder of Everything being held by a small someone.

He came back for you. He is your Prince Charming, riding in quietly and gently, to steal you away to your perfect Happily Forever After. He did it all for love... He did it all for you.

And He entered the scene as a baby boy. A baby born to save the world.

Scoop Him up, hold Him close, let your heart melt, still & quiet.

It's all going to be ok.

You're going to be ok.

He came down to get you.

He loved you into being. And when you fell? He came down to scoop you up. To hold you close. To love you boundlessly.

To give you peace beyond measure.

Be still and know that He's God... and He's got this. He's got you.

He's here to hold you. And He's here to stay.  

You're going to be ok.

One More Week!

Yesterday, the Feast of Christ the King, was the last Sunday of the Catholic liturgical year.

Next Sunday marks the beginning of our new year. A new advent. A new coming. A new looking forward instead of trying to run back and away.

This is a gentle nudge and reminder that I'll be starting a new adventure here on the blog in December - the adventure in search of the Greatest Gift, the grace of the Incarnation. It's an adventure that gives you a unique certainty of your success. God wants to be sought and He wants to be found.

That deep and seemingly endless desire that you have for relationship? Yeah, that comes from the fact that you were made in the image of God. God, our King, come to us as infant, wants a relationship with you.   

You may very well ask... "why are you bringing this up over and over and over again?" Because it's important. Because you deserve it. Because Christmas can be great in such a big way... and it only costs a few dollars and some time and some love.

If it helps you to understand why I'm doing this, I'll tell you.

First, let me say that this is a huge departure for me in terms of how I think, learn, function, etc. I endeavor to be bit of an academic, especially when it comes to my faith. I utterly reject anything that I perceive to be spiritual fluff. Utter rejection sometimes takes the form of hurling books into the trash. I like my faith to fill me with a wonder in a very intellectual way. I like to read and study things that "blow my mind."

Ann Voskamp is not an academic. That said, her words aren't fluff. She is someone who manages to get into my heart - to understand my heart - with her words. Her words always dig deep into a very human part of me. I love St. Thomas. He inspires me to wonder and to always search for more wonder and more mystery. But Ann tells a very human story, a very vulnerable & personal story. It's the type of thing that I tend to easily dismiss... but she always pulls me back to God and His love.

I don't want to miss Heaven by a short eighteen inches... those eighteen inches that separate my head and my heart.

So let's go adventuring together... shall we?

(p.s. - while it's not the Greatest Gift, there are some wonderful little gifts for the mamas and babies in your life over in my Etsy shop, thebagelbox. Take a peek. Yes, a shameless plug.)

What Advent Will Look Like Here

In my last post, I invited you all to join me in reading and praying through Ann Voskamp's book -- "The Greatest Gift: Unwrapping the Full Love Story of Christmas"-- with me this Advent. I've read through it once and am looking forward to reading it again so soon, more slowly this time, so as to really let it sink into my head and heart.

While preparing for the coming of our Lord, this blog is going to feature posts of a slightly other than usual nature. Rather than writing a lot of funny things, a lot of serious things, or really much of anything, I'm going to pick one quote from each day's short reading from the book and feature it here. This will serve as a bit of quiet contemplation time for me and, I hope, a gentle reminder to you of what Advent is intended to do: a time to slow down and prepare to be with our newborn Savior.

So that's what's happening here starting November 30th... see you there. :)

A Gentleman and a Scholar

I have the best guy friends IN THE WORLD.

Dan proved this rather emphatically this week.

As you all know, I was let go from my job on Tuesday after my Monday adventure to the ER. To add to the sadness, our company party was scheduled for last night. I was super excited. I had a pretty dress picked out, there was going to be dancing, and Dan had agreed to come with me as my "date." So when they ended my assignment, my Saturday plans went down the drain as well.

Until, that is, Dan stepped up to the man-plate and treated me like a princess. He picked me up, took me out to dinner (at The Field downtown), and then, as the surprise, we attending the Mission concert.

I had so much fun and felt so very loved.

To top off the excellence of the evening, another good friend (Jeff) was singing in the concert so we got to see him afterwards. I managed to snag a picture with the two of them.

Aren't they handsome? :) I am such a lucky girl to have such kind, wonderful, and handsome fellows in my life.

The Road to Christmas is Paved With Thanksgiving Intentions

I was a prisoner in my own home this week. I couldn't go in to work since they sprayed our office with some chemical that gave me a horrible, miserable asthma attack. I felt rather ill for the first couple of days, but I began to perk up a bit by the latter half. I dragged asked my gracious mother to bring me to her personal purgatory the craft store to get Thanksgiving decorations.

I was thwarted in my endeavors, however. Thanksgiving seems to be over in the world. Everything is green, red, gold, silver... in a word, Christmasy.

So, Christmas it is. I dove in with a great deal of zeal. I may have overestimated how healthy I was... I definitely crashed at the end of Thursday and Friday. But our house has many sparkly, bright, Christmasy things around it.

Enjoy some glimpses of our house in its festive garb.

I wrapped all of our wall art in Christmas paper. Yes, all of it. 

 I made the pointsettia curtain a few years ago and it has become an annual staple.

This combination was my mama's idea. And I love it.

 This garland was super fun to make. Although I would advise against buying glittery snow flakes at the dollar store. I was concerned that there wouldn't be any glitter left on them by the time I was done with the assembly.

 My sister super-glued the ribbon bows to the thumbtacks because, as she said, she isn't in danger of gluing herself to anything. haha!

 The wrapping paper is literally everywhere...

 A holiday bouquet.

 Now we just need an actual Christmas candle to put in the middle

 Another bouqet of shiny sparklies.

 Look what we have here!

 

 And no, not even my brother's sword escaped a bit of festive cheer. :)