Gag Reflex

I have a very sensitive gag reflex. It takes very little to make me gag.

Unfortunately, I don't just gag on dental x-rays. I gag on romance and sentiment. Like this image:

As an aside, I will fall for (probably) any man in military uniform. Just saying. And a kiss on the forehead? Super sweet.

But the quote? GAG. (To get the full effect, read the following with me talking really loud and waving my hands around like the crazy Italian woman I am).

First, the fact that we're all supposed to be striving to be "ideal" is just weird. What does that mean? Is there one archetype that ignores human complexity? (thanks, Kathryn, for that phrase. It hits the nail on the head, I think.)

Second, I just find it way too sentimental, mushy, fluffy, etc. I know that romance can be good. Sentiment, even, can be good. But this kind of romance and sentiment makes my skin crawl.

So what should this photo say?

Maybe something about not fitting an ideal, but being yourself without compromise. That way, those that are attracted to you will be attracted to YOU, not some ideal. If they marry you, they're going to have to live with you - not an ideal.

Maybe something about recognizing your faults and accepting them as a part of who you are. This does not mean that you shouldn't strive to overcome your faults. It means that you accept that you aren't perfect. You have to accept that because it's true. You are not perfect and no one is perfect for you. No one is perfect. Period. We can't be perfect for ourselves and we can't be perfect for each other.

Why not? Because life is messy. Sin made it that way. It's unscripted, disappointing, and messy. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you'll be happy. Stop waiting for the perfect person who matches that checklist you wrote. They're not coming.

You are a sinner. I am a sinner. We're all sinners. With sin, we can't be ideal. With free will and our beautifully, lovingly created souls, we can't all fit one ideal.

Loving is not about being blind to a person's faults. It is not about ignoring them when you notice them. Loving is about accepting the faults as part of the person. It is about forgiving the other person for hurt they cause. It's about second, third, and seventy-times-seven chances.

So stop making gag-worthy photo-catch-phrase combinations. Love is more complicated than a catch-phrase cutely paired with a photo.

I just want a normal guy who loves me and is willing to laugh at me, my strange antics, and, occasionally (maybe more than occasionally), himself. I want a guy who is smart and responsible. I want him to have faults because WHO ON EARTH WANTS TO LIVE WITH AN IDEAL MAN????? 

End of rant.