I Can Cant, Can You?

***WARNING!!! Rant post!!!!! Read at your own discretion. You need to exercise discretion because I am very emotional about this subject, not because it contains any foul language. This post is squeeeeeaky clean.***
 
Lemme just say, God might mount His throne to shouts of joy in general, but it was more like a dirge where I live.

Seriously.

I get it, there should be a certain solemnity to the music at Mass. I even understand that when chanting in a language that the majority of the world considers to be dead (Latin, donchaknow), a certain deadness is forgivable... even expected.

But for goodness' sake, the words are in ENGLISH here. You're singing, "God mounts His throne to shouts of JOY" repeatedly. It should evoke some, oh, I don't know, JOY, perhaps???

I couldn't bring myself to look at the cantor. I couldn't trust myself to look at anything except my missal, actually, which may have been millimeters from my face. Yes, I confess. I was hiding in my book. I was laughing hard and I feel terrible about it. One shouldn't laugh so hard at another person's solemnly solemn solemnness.

According to my sister, who has more self-control than me and could, therefore, look at the cantor, reports that the cantor looked quite joyful, even if she sounded horribly, tragically sad. While I'm glad she appeared more joyful than she sounded, it made me feel compelled to write this post to remind everyone that as a cantor, you're supposed to be assisting the prayers of the faithful through their auditory system, not their visual system.

I appreciate a well-dressed, dignified appearance, especially since the choir loft in our church isn't actually used as a choir loft, but a place from which someone can video choir concerts. If someone is going to be standing in front of the congregation, they should look dignified and understated. (Yes, this is a personal struggle of mine. I hope that if I wear nice enough clothes, I might be able to get away with the fact that I never look dignified. Sigh. Personal problem.) That said, there are some other things that a cantor should keep in mind with regard to the sounds coming out of his or her mouth, assaulting the ears of a captive audience.

1. Sound alive.
I cannot emphasize this enough. Before you get to any particular emotional conveyance, you need to sound alive. Please. Please,please,pleeeeease.

2. Match your emotions to the text.
So you sound alive? Good. Now convey the emotion that actually corresponds to the lyrics. Are we shouting for joy? Are we beseeching mercy? Well, then, do that thing. With your voice.

3. This is not a performance.
You are not a solo performer, this is not karaoke night. You are there to assist the faithful, not distract or amuse them. And, for the love of all that is holy, stay away from a Disney theme. There is a time and place for Disney. Mass? No. Just no. STOP.

End of rant.

(N.B. - this post is not intended to imply that I am a perfect or even a good cantor. When you guys give a bad review to a restaurant, it's because you feel like you have the right to call the kettle black, even though you yourself might be a pot. We must never stop striving for the right and perfect thing. For serious, guys.)

Double the Fun

I am so clever. My title covers two subjects: my double duty at work and my double scrapbook post. I am so proud of myself. Teehee.

So my double duty at work: because of my health problems (aka passing out at seemingly random times), they're "promoting" me. Instead of being the AR clerk pretending to be a receptionist, I am simply going to be an AR clerk. This means that I'll be inside with the rest of the normal people instead of out in the elevator lobby. It also means that I'll get a bit more money. And that I don't have to wear my TAC skirts every day of the week. Yay for jeans, cute tops, and 'cessories!

However, this week, I'm BOTH. I'm learning how to do a full time job... which means I'm doing everything that my new full time job will involve and doing my receptionist job. If you call the corporate office, my "thank you for calling" may be said really quickly and not quite so happily. I'm a bit frazzled. (Hey, you try doing two full-time jobs in a normal 8 hour day. Exactly.) So the fun in the title refers to this face a bit... sarcastically.

The double scrapbook post:
The "Sanctus" I did on Sunday... rather fittingly, I think. It's a shot a snapped at my graduation Mass from the choir loft. I just love it when all the servers have the candles and incense and kneel in front. Such a moving visual. And just for those who are Latin illiterate, "sanctus" means "holy," which is the part of the Mass we were singing at the time of this picture.

The "Croquet Date" layout I did today. The picture is from my second date with my "big brother." It was a big group win-a-date. We ate snacks and drank beer. A lot of beer. In this particular picture, Chris is telling me "you need to put the stick lower." And this was at the beginning of the afternoon. By the end of the afternoon, I'd swing, completely miss, topple over from the momentum, and crash land on my tush. Graceful, yeah. Maybe that's why he "broke up with me" on the way back to campus.