Right

Ever wonder about something that's just huge and seemingly unsolvable? To muddle through it, all of the problematic aspects and promising parts, and get some sort of idea of the correct answer?

With math, you know there's one right answer (possibly with a number of correct expressions). With people, there often is not one right answer. You can't just slap down a solution that contains all of the variables perfectly. Sure, you can get probabilities. The minute details change things. And you can't perfectly account for the minute details without perfectly knowing the persons involved.

This is what makes human relationships so difficult, but so wonderful. It's because you can't predict them. You find friends in unexpected places. You also find that there aren't friends in expected places. You hit it off with one, and are irritated by the other.

I don't like this phenomenon. Sure, it allows for some great surprises. But I don't like not having an answer. I like math and science because I can find an answer. I don't like psychology because it's so... vague.

My dislike directly corresponds to my need to control things, which is not a good thing. Why can't I just let it go? Let things be mysterious. Let people surprise me. It may even be pleasant.

Good things, they say, come to those who wait.

Life Is Like Dessert

I got a little seedling planted in my brain this morning. A little seed of another person's (Ann Voskamp, "One Thousand Gifts") thought that ripened into a bit of a reflection on life.

Life is like dessert.

Dessert is sweet. Every bite is something to enjoy. It brings joy when savored. Many recipes are made better by contrasting flavors, some less sweet than others. By adding nuts or marmalade or rhubarb, you add to the layers of flavor that make the whole more enticing.

Life is the same way. There are days that are so sweet that you couldn't ask for any little bit of them to be better. But the days that aren't quite so sweet, that have pain and struggles and sadness in them, add to the overall flavor of life as a whole. No one would want every day to be entirely comprised of hard knocks, just as no one would want to munch on plain rhubarb. But the perfect combination is the most satisfactory of all. The sun shines clearest and brightest after the darkest clouds.

Dessert is short. It is a little crown to the meal, a brief moment of exceptional sweetness. It shouldn't be wolfed down or eaten with half-attention. It's too short for that. We all want to hold onto it. Those who want more dessert are simply those who didn't savor those first bites. Seconds are simply a way of making up for that rush.

Life, too, is brief. It ends so fast. I didn't understand this as a child. The two days before Christmas seemed like an eternity. The time span between birthdays was an infinite void that wasn't able to be traversed by mere mortals. But now it goes by so fast. Too fast. One day to another, one task to another, and then, all of the sudden... it's over. We always want more life. More days. More time. Could it simply be that we didn't slow down enough to enjoy it? To really, truly experience it? To savor it? That request for more seems to be a compensation for our missing it the first time around. We want a second chance, even if we don't realize exactly what it is we missed.

Dessert isn't strictly necessary: a cook doesn't have to make dessert to complete a meal. But it is made simply for the enjoyment of those partaking in the meal. A gift given from a desire to please beyond what is strictly necessary for nourishment. It makes people happy.

Life, the gift we're given moment by moment, isn't strictly necessary either. God, in his infinite power, glory, knowledge, simplicity, being, and essence does not need to give life to anything. His being is the same as His essence. He is wholly self-sufficient, not reliant on anything outside of Himself. He lacks nothing. But yet, here we are. Each one of us, every created thing, has been given life as a free gift. It allows us to be happy. The search for happiness, which is common to all men, is made possible by the life we're given. God can only have created us for our good alone: we give nothing to Him that He does not already have. But he wanted, willed, desired to create us for our good. Our life, our existence, is not strictly necessary. But it's given to us to make us happy.

Life is like dessert.

Bear in Mind

"What makes a man a good priest - or a good husband - is being a real man. What distinguishes a real man is that he is able to give all of himself, without reservation, to the call. He doesn't just want to be able to give his whole self, but is actually able to, without holding anything back. You need to be able to give your whole self."

~ Father Raymond in "Black as Night" by Regina Doman

It isn't hard to apply this to oneself. In my case, obviously, the roles of nun or wife are the ones available to me, but the principle remains the same.

Just think about it.

Something to think about . . .

The Third Sorrowful Mystery, from the perspective of the rose
by Danielle Rose

My seed was born
One bright spring morn
In gardens grown by God.
Out of the earth
My stem gave birth
To petals red as blood.

The gentile rain
My growth sustained,
And like each seed God sows,
I dreamed one day
That I'd be named
A king's most precious rose.
--
One day a soldier
Bent me over,
Tore me from my bed.
All beaten, battered,
My stem tattered,
Wanted not but dead

In cruel hands ripped,
My beauty stripped,
'Twas not the dream I chose,
And filled with shame,
I wept in pain,
No more a precious rose.
--
Then did I see
The soldiers lead
A man through palace doors.
Was this my king?
Why did they bring him in,
This man so poor?

A purple garment
Hid the torment
None but I could see.
They mocked and laughed,
Gave him a staff,
And bowed on bended knee.
--
They bent me round
And wove a crown
And placed me on his head.
My petals found
Crushed on the ground,
Like tears of God turned red.

With each small sin
I was pressed in.
I pierced with self-disdain.
In thought and deed
I made him bleed,
My selfishness, his pain.
--
"Behold!" they'd sing,
"Behold your King!
Hail, King of the Jews!"
With each reed's blow,
Our pain did grow,
As one we are abused.

Despite the crown
He did not frown;
He smiled with love instead,
And carried me
For all to see
Upon his tender head.
--
Once placed with awe
In manger straw,
Anointed by John's hands,
Transfigured on
A mountain dawn,
Now wore a mangled branch.

Once gently kissed
By Mary's lips,
And blessed with magi's myrrh,
Baptized by
A parting sky,
Now streamed with blood so pure.
--
An innocent brow
Calls to us now
To follow this example:
To let our thorns
And all that scorns
Be healed within his temple.

Though dreams may fade,
Each one was made
In seed that Jesus sows.
And now I see
I'm called to be
The King's most precious rose.

A Novena Prayer

A group of us have been doing a novena for a friend's healing, and this is the prayer I decided to use. I really love it... hope you do too!


Novena of Confidence
to the Sacred Heart

O Lord Jesus Christ,
To your most Sacred Heart,
I confide this/these intention:

(mention your intention )

Only look upon me, And then do
What your Sacred Heart inspires.

Let your Sacred Heart decide
I count on it, I trust in it
I throw myself on Your mercy,
Lord Jesus!
You will not fail me.

Sacred Heart of Jesus,
I trust in You.
Sacred Heart of Jesus,
I believe in Your love for me.
Sacred Heart of Jesus,
Your Kingdom come.
O Sacred Heart of Jesus,
I have asked you for many favors,
But I earnestly implore this one.
Take it.

Place it in Your open, broken Heart;
And, when the Eternal Father looks upon It,
Covered with Your Precious Blood,
He will not refuse it.

It will be no longer my prayer,
But Yours, O Jesus.
O Sacred Heart of Jesus,
I place all my trust in You.

Let me not be disappointed.

Amen.

An Excerpt

from Regina Doman's "Black as Night"

Sometimes, it amazes me
How strong the power of love can be
Sometimes it just takes my breath away.

You watched my love grow like a child,
Sometimes gentle and sometimes wild,
Sometimes you just take my breath away.

And it's too good to slip by,
It's too good to lose,
It's too good to be there just to use

I'm going to stand on a mountaintop and tell the good nws
That you take my breath away.

Your beauty is there in all I see
And when I feel your eyes on me
Sometimes you just take my breath away.

Since my life is yours, my heart will be
Singing for you eternally
Sometimes you just take my breath away.

And it's too good to slip by,
It's too good to lose,
It's too good to be there just to use.

I'm going to stand on a mountaintop and tell the good news
That you take my breath away.

At last he receded, and let his picking linger to a stop. When the last string had stopped vibrating and stillness filled the closet again, he looked up to find he had a live audience as well. Brother Herman and Nora were leaning against the wall of the sacristy, listening.
"Beautiful," Brother Herman said. He glanced at Nora, who still hadn't moved.
"Yes," she said at last. She took a deep breath. "Is that a religious song?"
"It's just a folk song from the 70's I learned growing up," Brother Leon said. "No, it's not really religious."
"But it's a true love song," Brother Herman said, patting Nora's shoulder. "And hence, deeply religious."

Moment

Well, my flu-like symptoms have dissipated and I have a better perspective on life right now. A song that completely and totally expresses my mood right now? Providence dropped it in my lap this evening. It's by the group "Leahy" (who are AWESOME, btw -- you should check them out) and though I heard it years ago, it struck a particular chord with me tonight (no pun intended)Here's the chorus:

"And I'll run to the light
Though I don't know what's coming before me
I'll be alright
Now I know, I'm alive
Oh, my heart is wide open,
I'm giving each moment my life"

Breathe in, breathe out. Life is good, even if I can't tell from where I'm standing.