Blog Your Heart | February

[I copied and pasted the rules from Stephanie's blog
Here are the rules, in case you are new:
1. blog whatever is authentic. whatever is truly on your mind and in your heart.
2. it can be serious, silly, short, long. note:no one said it has to be serious. but it should be authentic.
3. no judging allowed no snarky comments, no making fun, no passive agressive digs. nothing here is whining. it's me honestly sharing my feelings. if you feel that it's whining, then you don't have to read. :)
Now you know. :)]

1. I was just thinking yesterday that it's been months since the last one of these. I thought I might adventure into it on my own... but I found I was too scared. I gather a lot of strength from the people around me and sometimes have a hard time doing things without their (direct or indirect) approval. Something I need to work on for Lent (convenient that it starts in five days). When Stephanie posted hers this morning, I felt like it was my permission to share what is on my heart and mind. Silly? Probably. True? Definitely.

2. The last one kinda leads into this one - I have a lot to work on for Lent. We were talking about it last night at Bible study and one of my friends playfully quipped, "Oh, Bridget, I'll make you a list of what you need to work on letting go. And you won't have time for Bible study." hehe. So true. I need to 1) set aside chunks of time in my day to pray, 2) learn to trust (I've gotten better with the trusting God part, but still have miles to go with the trusting people part), 3) learning to live&act without other people's approval. I could go on, but I don't want to bore you :)

3. I want another dog. There's a big, black, super sweet greyhound that I want to adopt. I want to name him Maximus to go with our Augusta. How cute would that be?

4. Scrapbooking is expensive. Gee willikers. I only shop sale/clearance items, but still. I need to scrap more slowly so I go through my stuff less quickly.

5. I love teaching. I have recently discovered this by teaching confirmation classes at our parish. I love preparing for the classes, presenting&discussing the material with the kids... I just love it. I don't have terribly good classroom control, though. Thank goodness my sister co-teaches with me because she doesn't put up with any nonsense.

6. I was going to do a 10K walk with my sis and my good friend, but I can barely walk a mile without collapsing, so no such luck for me. I'm bummed. I'll go cheer them on and meet them from brunch after, though. :)

7. I have a way overdeveloped sense of paranoia. I was in the midst of explaining this to a couple of friends last night (my fear of getting kidnapped/raped/killed is kinda excessive) and they were trying to calm me down when I got a phone call from my mother letting me know that they had found a car that was associated with the rogue former-LAPD-officer at the sheriff's station in town so they were all out looking for him. Helicopters, squad cars, etc. Freaked me out to a point of near hysteria. I am kinda ridiculous.

8. I am a much happier person since the last time I did one of these. All of the medication they put me on has made me a totally different person. Well, not different from how I was before junior year at TAC, but different from the totally panicked, overwrought, nervous person I was just a few months ago.

I hope you all have a blessed weekend!